This is where I might normally write a witty intro and talk about why I’m writing things today. In this particular case, it’s actually just stupidly simple:
Let’s go full dork and rank the Star Trek films.
Engage!
RANCID
13. Star Trek V: The Final Frontier – This movie is a dang mess. I’ll just leave it at that.
12. Star Trek: The Motion Picture (1979) – It’s like “2001,” except boring.
SOME GOOD, SOME BAD
11. Star Trek III: The Search for Spock – It feels like a cheat, and it’s pretty cornball besides.
10. Star Trek: Insurrection – The Riker-Troi reunion is fun, but there’s not much that stands out beyond that.
9. Star Trek: Generations – Gives Data/Picard some development and Shatner is actually really good. It’s pretty weak otherwise.
8. Star Trek Into Darkness – I hate the ending and the reveal is pretty dumb/anticlimactic, but it’s still got some good bits.
7. Star Trek: Nemesis – Tom Hardy before he became Tom Hardy. Appreciate the final space battle.
ACTUALLY GOOD
6. Star Trek IV: The Voyage Home – This is the “B-minus” of Trek films. Goofy and fun.
5. Star Trek Beyond – Kind of a similar vibe to IV, but with better action.
4. Star Trek (2009) – The rare reboot that doesn’t make me angry.
3. Star Trek: First Contact – So much of this movie works. As usual, it’s the Borg that gives TNG crew their best opportunity to shine.
2. Star Trek VI: The Undiscovered Country – Christopher Plummer as a cackling Klingon who quotes Shakespeare. A film with political consequence. That Spock gets to play Holmes is the icing on the cake.
1. Star Trek II: The Wrath of Khan – Trek just doesn’t get any better.