Donkey Kong Country 2: Diddy’s Kong Quest — Retro Gaming Essentials (No. 32)

Rhythm games haven’t always been so explicit.

Today’s generation of rhythm games – including such noteworthy examples as “Thumper” and “Crypt of the NecroDancer” – are very clear about their design choices in relation to the objectives, generally providing an on-screen timed graphic of some sort meant to coincide with a gamer’s button press. 

It all works within the flow of the music, but the idea being conveyed is clear. “Press a button … now!”

If the person playing times their button presses well enough, they are rewarded with praise, advancement, and sometimes even rewards.

This simple concept, of indicating to a gamer when and where they should push a button, as though the music itself isn’t enough of an indicator, has been around quite a while. 

1996’s “Parappa the Rapper” is often credited with popularizing this template, and that game absolutely deserves every ounce of praise it has ever received … though it wasn’t exactly alone in creating this sub-genre.

Of course, musical games like “Simon” predate Parappa by a good bit, and if you consider them for longer than a minute, you do realize that while the rhythm of those games is an afterthought, it does emerge organically, particularly as it relates to the avoidance of running out of time.

Moreover, though Simon was an external device/toy unconnected to any dedicated hardware, it was absolutely electronic in nature with a requirement of interactivity in order that it might operate properly.

Within that context, we might accurately say that the origins of the rhythm video game actually lie nearly 50 years past. 

And yet, the true heyday, the “golden era” if you will, was the mid-90s to mid-2000s.

“Parappa the Rapper” beget “Beatmania” which beget “Dance Dance Revolution” (Dance Dance is a whole different conversation that we shall come to at some point in this countdown, I can assure you) which went on to beget “Bust a Groove,” and on and on we went, along through games like “Rock Band” and “Guitar Hero” which themselves became MONSTER hits (with gamers and non-gamers alike).

The newer games within the genre (released within the past decade or so) distinguish themselves by offering interesting thematic elements such as specific characters and music an audience might gravitate towards (Kingdom Hearts! Zelda! The Beatles!), as well as deeper environments to explore that don’t merely consist of one static screen, or perhaps if we’re really gonna get crazy, a screen that scrolls towards you while the notes/button presses come flying at you in real time.

But there’s a noticeable, familiar chaining to this system. “Press a button … now!. Press a different button … now!”

It’s pretty much always this way.

And it doesn’t have to be.

To understand this, we merely need to circle back to a different sort of rhythm game that predates the likes of Dance Dance Revolution, Rock Band, and Parappa the Rapper. One that’s less explicit in its stated intent, yet no less demanding when the game fires up. 

You are not visually or verbally told to press certain buttons … the game merely demands it of you instead. 

You are required to do things a certain way to progress, and that way is rhythmic in nature.

Jump. Jump. Bounce. Bounce. 

Pause. Jump. Pause. Jump. 

Attack. Move. Attack. Move.

Enemies are spaced from one another to encourage these inputs. The music is smooth and appealing enough to pull you in, yet urgent enough to pull you forward

Patterns emerge. The soundtrack mirrors the action and vice versa.

Jump. Bounce. Bounce. Bounce.

Jump. Bounce. Bounce. Bounce.

And as you progress through the game, this oddity, of there being a rhythmic nature of one’s inputs, becomes more and more obvious, until eventually, there is little point in denying what is happening.

For those who have been paying attention, “Donkey Kong Country” offered up its own kind of rhythm game when it launched as a reboot/rebranding of Nintendo’s big ape in 1994.

And the series’ first sequel, “Donkey Kong Country 2: Diddy’s Kong Quest,” managed to not only continue that tradition in resounding fashion, but also remains an absolute masterclass in incredible platforming to this day, refining and perfecting what its predecessor laid the groundwork for.

And what is that, exactly?

A true A+ rhythm platformer.

Donkey Kong Country 2 at a glance:

  • Genre: Side-scrolling platformer
  • Released: 1995
  • Platform: Super Nintendo
  • No. 17 in Complex’s “Best Super Nintendo Games of All Time”
Continue reading Donkey Kong Country 2: Diddy’s Kong Quest — Retro Gaming Essentials (No. 32)

WhoDatJedi podcast episode: The Great Big Ridiculous STAR WARS DRAFT

Happy Star Wars Podcast Day, everybody! On this, the 186th episode of the WhoDatJedi podcast, your hosts — Aaron Svoboda (@Aaron_Svoboda), Alfredo Narvaez (@NOLA_Fredo) and David Gladow (@davegladow) — are joined by special guest Kevin Held (@seanorleans) of the Saints Happy Hour Podcast (@SaintsHappyHour) to get in the full spirit of Super Bowl season and hold a great big ridiculous STAR WARS DRAFT. (Hey, when you want to do a draft properly, you bring in the biggest local mock draft podcaster of them all.) So buckle up for a fun ride as we ponder such important topics as whether Lobot should be considered a droid, if Jabba is a creature or humanoid, and just how a person might fit a Rancor onto a sail barge. Click through and scroll down for spoilers on who everyone drafted and follow us on Twitter to vote for your favorite team. Fredo … you are on the clock.

Continue reading WhoDatJedi podcast episode: The Great Big Ridiculous STAR WARS DRAFT

My games of 2023

When Nintendo announced that the latest game in its Legend of Zelda series, “Tears of the Kingdom” would release in May of this year, it wasn’t an absolute lock that the game would top my list this year, despite my obvious affection for its direct predecessor, “Breath of the Wild.”

I mean, yes, it was likely, but I was still dipping my toe in with a few other genuine all-timers for the first time this year, and there was no real guarantee I’d click with Tears anyway.

As it happens, three other games ended up earning a perfect score from me in 2023, “Super Mario Odyssey,” “Metroid Prime Remastered,” and “Gris.” Those three, along with Tears of the Kingdom, finished outside of my personal all-time Top 20 despite getting a 10/10 (the competition is stiff up there!), and all four games have been welcomed to my favorites list in the same general area. 

You could say that they are brand-new neighbors now in my world of video game nostalgia and fondness. I give my highest recommendation that people play all four of them.

So, there was competition, and Zelda itself didn’t instantly become one of my absolute favorites. 

But despite all that, Zelda finished on top of my 2023 list anyway.

The how and why is at least a little interesting (at least to me), so I wanted to devote a few extra words to Tears of the Kingdom: in particular how it takes risks, how it plays it safe, and how it fits into the overall Zelda tapestry. 

Continue reading My games of 2023

Every comic book movie ranked (mostly)

(Last updated Dec. 21, 2023.  Originally published June 12, 2016.)

I like to ruminate on comic book movies a bit.

This probably reads fairly silly to some of the deeper thinkers out there, but it is what it is I suppose. I’m not going to make a convincing enough argument in this space that anyone should ascribe a whole ton of deep meaning to these kinds of movies, but for whatever’s it worth, they generally make me think a bit. It’s probably fair to say that some blockbusters are dumber than others, and for some, the style of fare that the Marvel Cinematic Universe (MCU) churns out (and at 2-3 movies a year, it is by now accurate to call it a churn) just doesn’t do it for them. It’s clearly turned into a significant money maker for the mouse, and the time commitment to consume them all, let alone the repetitive nature of the films are all good reasons to stay away.

Respect.

That said, I enjoy them a great deal. I appreciate escapism for its own sake, as mentioned above I can take away some decent life lessons and social commentary from them, and perhaps most importantly, they are movies I can bond with my family over. When my son Nate tells me he wants to watch “Thor,” and I can watch it with him, that is an experience I treasure.

I thought I would re-rank these films in the interest of sparking a little debate OR encouraging people to check a couple of them out if they haven’t. Some of this stuff I would recommend above the rest, and I guess that is the point more than anything. Also, this is sort of fun.

Continue reading Every comic book movie ranked (mostly)

Metroid Prime — Retro Gaming Essentials (No. 31)

Metroid Prime is a testament to the concept of “where there’s a will, there’s a way.”

For the better part of a decade, the idea that a game like Metroid Prime could even exist stretched the imaginations of developers and gamers everywhere. 

Could it be done?

A decidedly 2D concept, that of a large, atmospheric map that is gradually unlocked through the accumulation of additional powers acquired via backtracking and exploration, dependent upon tight, precise controls as well as highly specific memorization of not just enemy attack patterns but also more critically of the terrain itself … Metroid just didn’t seem like an easy thing to convert into a 3D space.

Also problematic was that Metroid, as a franchise, had never, not once, ever been a big seller.

We’re talking about a brand that had traditionally been outsold by such glorified tech demos as Pilotwings and Mario Paint (fine experiments in gaming to be sure, but not exactly the first games that roll off the tongue when talking about the greatest or even the most popular video games of all time). 

Overwhelming financial incentive to engineer such a difficult switch-up just wasn’t there.

So, thusly, a 3D conversion for Metroid wouldn’t happen for a long time.

Eventually, of course, it did. But by the time Metroid Prime released on the GameCube in the fall of 2002 to glowing reviews, Nintendo had lost its stranglehold on the gaming industry to Sony and the mighty Playstation 2, thereby ensuring that Metroid would, once again, sadly not sell a gazillionty copies.

I think this is important to note, as Metroid, to this day, remains a niche property, appealing to a relatively small audience. This is despite the fact that:

  1. Metroid games, by and large, are incredibly good. Like almost illogically good?
  2. Metroid Prime should have been an absolute gold standard, Grade-A system seller.

On that second point, my contention is that Metroid Prime would have had every opportunity to find an entirely different level of success above and beyond the 2.84 million copies it sold had it not been married to a gaming system that consumers just weren’t buying.

Speaking from personal experience as a PS2 owner back in the day, I had little incentive to double-dip and buy a second gaming system. I, like many others, knew there were only so many hours in the day to devote to gaming, and also, I was poorer than dirt.

So … no GameCube for me. The temptation to go against this very sound logic was literally one game: Metroid Prime.

And that just wasn’t enough.

The GameCube, still utterly beloved by generations of Nintendo stans, finished third in sales (21.74 million units sold) during its generation’s heyday, behind the aforementioned Playstation 2 (155 million!), and the new kids on the block, Microsoft and their Xbox (24 million).

Xbox’s system seller was Halo, a game that very much deserves its flowers (while the Playstation 2 had too many “system sellers” to even count – that system’s library is insane!).

But Halo – to this day a monster of a property for Microsoft (perhaps its most important) with over 81 millions copies sold – was simply no Metroid Prime. 

Was Halo excellent? 

Yes. (It’ll absolutely make an appearance on this countdown at some point.)

Was Halo revelatory

No. Not quite.

So … why didn’t Metroid Prime take off in quite the same way?

Well, we noted it being chained to a comparatively unpopular system, but beyond that, the game itself was a quieter, more thoughtful affair. “Cerebral” isn’t usually one of the first characteristics one might list when noting what mass audiences crave.

Nintendo as a brand was also no longer seen as cool or edgy in the GameCube era. Having hemorrhaged developers during the N64 days due to an odd commitment to cartridges (a commitment they dumped a generation later), Nintendo WAS at least trying interesting things with its main properties. Zelda was now a cell-shaded cartoon. Mario was wandering around a tropical resort with a water cannon on his back. Luigi had his own game, and it was very much unlike a traditional Mario platformer. Heck, even Mario Kart had a gimmick.

But some of those creative decisions alienated long-time fans while simultaneously failing to court new users. At best, some of that generation’s games might be characterized as colorful diversions (Luigi’s Mansion). At worst, they could be called actual missteps (Mario Sunshine).

But regardless, it felt like Nintendo was throwing things against a wall to see what would stick.

And it was within that type of environment, with spaghetti dripping down the walls, that they handed the keys to Metroid over to a subsidiary, Retro Studios, to take on an unenviable task: 

Make Metroid 3D.

They succeeded brilliantly.

Metroid Prime at a glance:

Genre: First-Person Action-Adventure
Released: 2002
Platform: GameCube
No. 10 in Nintendo Power’s “Top 200 Nintendo Games Ever”
Continue reading Metroid Prime — Retro Gaming Essentials (No. 31)

Tony Hawk’s Pro Skater — Retro Gaming Essentials (No. 30)

Maybe you had to be there to fully appreciate it. 

Or perhaps you somehow missed it even if you lived through it.

Regardless, I am here to tell you: “Tony Hawk’s Pro Skater” was a whole mood.

There was a time when this game repped a significant piece of our world’s culture. 

I don’t believe I’m overstating things when I say this. The skating scene was blowing up, this game was blowing up, and it all became the sort of thing that, while it was certainly juvenile and maybe a little bit silly, it was also the sort of thing that a LOT of people got into.

So, let’s set the stage a little for the younger folk (and the people who like to reminisce). 

Way back in the fall of 1993, ESPN, not content to keep swimming through the bags of money they were already making through cable rights deals, made the somewhat illogical decision to launch a second network, because, well, who hates money, amirite?

They went with the novel name of “ESPN2” with its on-air personalities regularly referring to it as “The Deuce.” 

Cute.

Now, backing up a smidge, I say the venture was “somewhat illogical” because only the tiniest of details – a giant, gaping lack of programming – was a potential stumbling block. 

Oops! 

Well, this lack of programming foresight encouraged the folks at ESPN to get creative about what they’d put on, which led to the creation of the X Games … as well as many, many jokes about scraping the bottom of the barrel for something, anything to put on the air. ESPN2 sorta became synonymous with airing ridiculous events that were decidedly not sports-related, barely sports-related, or maybe even (in the best case scenario) somewhat sports related. 

Anyhow, most of it had a tenuous connection to “traditional” sports (or no connection at all).

The aforementioned X Games was a made-from-scratch Olympics-style competition for offbeat, alternative sports like snowboarding, motocross, BMX, and of course, skateboarding, that made its debut in 1995. And the X Games, despite its nature as a corporate creation with a limited appeal outside of a niche audience, grew in popularity over time. 

These events, after all, were more sports-like than something like lumberjacking or billiards.

Eventually, people began to figure out there was money to be made in marketing to a demographic that was interested in watching what was essentially counter-culture entertainment.

“Eff the man! Buy more product!”

It was probably inevitable. I mean, there were sports drinks to peddle. What I recall most about that era, culturally, was that everything back then had to be “cool.” It was a requirement. It’s why video game commercials of the era were ridiculous and looked like this:

So OF COURSE the X Games became a thing.

And one of the biggest players on this brand-new stage was Tony Hawk.

Hawk, a professional skateboarder, was so popular that it’s probably unnecessary for me to have just typed that he is a professional skateboarder. In the same way that people know Michael Jordan is a basketball player, or Mario is a video game character, Tony Hawk came to be the embodiment of his entire sport. 

You already know who Tony Hawk is.

But if you weren’t around back then (or very, very young), you might not understand that at least some of the reason the man is synonymous with skateboarding is the existence of “Tony Hawk’s Pro Skater.”

Tony Hawk’s Pro Skater at a glance

Genre: Sports
Released: 1999
Platform: PlayStation
No. 36 on Game Informer’s Top 100 Games of All Time
Continue reading Tony Hawk’s Pro Skater — Retro Gaming Essentials (No. 30)

DuckTales — Retro Gaming Essentials (No. 29)

Life is like a hurricane,
here in Duckburg.
Racecars, lasers, aeroplanes,
it’s a duck blur.
Might solve a mystery.
Or rewrite history…

“DuckTales,” the classic Disney half-hour afternoon cartoon that debuted in 1987 and ran for four seasons (though much longer in syndication), has shown a rare capacity for endurance that shows of its ilk rarely can even aspire to. 

Don’t believe me? Sing the first couple of bars of that theme song in public and see if the people around you join in.

If they don’t, you’ll feel really silly, and that’s kind of funny.

But chances are, at least a few people will sing along (or at least crack a big goofy grin as you make a fool of yourself).

And with good reason, as the show, for a good number of Gen Xers, was a babysitter as they latch-keyed their way into their homes and killed time for the couple of hours until their parents got home from work.*

* Gen Xers are very proud of being latch-key and will bring that fact up on literally every occasion possible, in the same way that a vegetarian will always proudly tell you that they are vegetarian. How do you get a Gen Xer out of your house? Invite over their parents.

How good was DuckTales? Well, probably not as good as you remember. It leans heavily on other pieces of work and falls into simplistic tropes with dialogue that will mostly appeal to minors. And the animation itself isn’t ground-shaking either.

But that’s honestly okay, because a thing doesn’t have to be great to be important.

And DuckTales was absolutely an important piece of pop culture.

The show, itself a risk due to its heavy production demands for what might have been considered meager rewards in a traditionally low-viewed time slot, instead was immensely popular and paved the way for even more Disney afternoon animated shows like “Chip ‘n Dale: Rescue Rangers” and “Tailspin.”

In its own way, DuckTales can also be given some credit (or blame) for Disney’s ability to weather some lean years in the 1980s when the studio was having a difficult time finding success at the box office (prior to “The Little Mermaid,” that is).

The fondness and popularity for DuckTales eventually spawned a reboot of the show in 2017, once again for a few seasons, except this time it was objectively entertaining for adults. The test of time will likely be far kinder to the reboot in terms of actual repeat viewings, as the series, for any fans of the brand at all, is basically a must-watch, delightful and humorous and engaging. (It’s seriously THAT good … go watch it right now if you haven’t seen it yet.)

Of course, the reboot and all of the merchandise and crossovers and so forth and so on over all of the years … none of that tells the entire story, because the entire story wouldn’t be complete without an acknowledgement of the licensed video game that was developed and released alongside the cartoon in 1989.

That licensed video game, “DuckTales,” somehow became one of the greatest platformers of all time.

‘DuckTales’ at a glance:

Genre: Platformer
Released: 1989
Platform: NES
Nintendo Power’s No. 44 greatest game of all time
Continue reading DuckTales — Retro Gaming Essentials (No. 29)

Super Mario RPG: Legend of the Seven Stars — Retro Gaming Essentials (No. 28)

Like many other video game enthusiasts of the early 90’s, I received a free copy of Dragon Warrior with my “Nintendo Power” subscription.

(Bear with me here.)

Freebie games are now a dime a dozen (generally geared toward getting your money through add-on purchases after the fact!), but in 1990-91 when this promotion occurred, it was mind-bending as hell.

Console games back then, pretty much without exception, cost $50 a pop. Yeah, many games eventually went on sale, and yeah, there were some exceptions – like one-offs on the Genesis or most (all?) of the games on the pricier NeoGeo – but by and large, that was the default cost: $50.

So you had to be choosy. And I, like many other western gamers, wasn’t ready to dump $50 into a role-playing game.*

* This is why the promotion existed, to get western gamers to try to get onboard with RPGs, since they were so huge in Japan and Nintendo wanted to maximize profits in the West as well. 

I had brain rot for action, you see. “Die Hard” and “Star Wars” were probably my favorite movies by this point (“The Blues Brothers” might have been a close third). Playground activities centered around pretending to club other kids with some sort of blunt instrument (or actually connecting on occasion … Sorry, Gary!). 

Video games, by extension, needed to be fast-paced as well, yes?

Well, not always, as it turned out. 

Because of the Dragon Warrior offer, I learned I could receive a free game if I subscribed to a magazine I loved already. And that was something different entirely.

I signed up in about 0.0003 seconds.

And thusly, Dragon Warrior – the grindiest of painfully grindy RPGs – became my definitive viewpoint of the genre for the next decade. 

It was the first and last impression. The alpha and the omega. Nothing to see here, folks, this is all there is.

“Yeah, this is fun I guess, but what’s with all the boring, repetitive, unavoidable battles? I’m not playing another game like this.”*

* It is beyond safe to say that Dragon Warrior will NOT be making an appearance on this list. Yes, it’s historically relevant, and yes, I still have great affinity for it. But at some point, you have to ask yourself, “Would I honestly recommend someone sit down with this thing today and try to play it?” The answer with Dragon Warrior: Not unless I was playing a cruel prank on someone.

So when “Super Mario RPG: Legend of the Seven Stars” came along in 1996, it couldn’t have been further from my radar. 

And justifiably so on some level, because even though it is undeniably stupid to generalize an entire genre of video game because of just one game, that one game in question was extremely difficult to love.

I regret nothing.

Except…

Holy smokes, did I miss out on some genuine bangers for a really long time.

Thank goodness for retro gaming as an actual business and my own personal resolve to circling back to missed games as an adopted mentality.

Because Super Mario RPG is a downright joyful experience.

Super Mario RPG: Legend of the Seven Stars at a glance

Genre: RPG
Release: 1996
Platform: SNES
Complex’s No. 8 Best Super Nintendo Game
Continue reading Super Mario RPG: Legend of the Seven Stars — Retro Gaming Essentials (No. 28)

NBA Jam — Retro Gaming Essentials (No. 27)

“He’s on fire!”

For anyone who has experienced the true greatness that is NBA Jam, that phrase should be all it takes to transport you away to a world of frenetic, over-the-top, arcade basketball. 

It’s a world of dunks, steals, and hot streaks.

It’s a world in which putting yourself in the shoes of superstars like Charles Barkley, Hakeem Olajowan, and Shaquille O’Neal (to name just a few) was a mere dollar away.*

* My memory might be hazy on this point, but I do recall the game costing more than the typical quarter or even 50 cents a play – I’m PRETTY sure it usually cost at least a buck to play – and that it was of great annoyance to me that this was the case. “Games used to cost 25 cents. Why are we now charging more? It’s outlandish and unfair!” Clearly, inflation as a concept had yet to penetrate my teenage boy brain.

It’s a world of impossible physics and ridiculous commentary.

It’s a world of insane levels of rubber-banding that could reduce the hardest of men to quivering tears.

It’s a world of fantastical cameos and easter eggs, not the least of which was a playable version of Bill Clinton himself.

In other words, this world, the world of NBA Jam, is the very best kind of world.

Buckle up, kids. 

We’re about to go deep on NBA Jam, the most outrageous mainstream sports game our society has ever seen.

NBA Jam at a glance

Genre: Sports
Release: 1993
Platform: Arcade
No. 19 on Flux’s Top 100 Video Games
Continue reading NBA Jam — Retro Gaming Essentials (No. 27)

What people are missing in conference realignment

Ah, it’s been awhile since I’ve waded into the conference realignment mularkey.

Why is that? Well, partly because I didn’t feel a particular need to quote Joe Biden. 

I also haven’t had much to add to the discussion. Many of us know the basics by this point, I think. 

But more critically, my hesitation is also about the potential for sounding downright stupid. 

That’s not a “me” problem, specifically, but I’m not immune. I’ve dropped some stinkers in the realignment prediction business while studiously trying to avoid doing exactly that. The minefield that is this game within a game is perilous. 

Granted, some of the worst offenders in that regard don’t really mind being galactically wrong. For them it’s not about being right or wrong. They’d prefer to make noise and get attention and the aftermath can be whatever it will be. Like a loud politician overpromising and under-delivering, the show is the show, and it is king above such trivial concerns as truth or decency.

But my point is that NO ONE is immune to stepping in it. 

And I’d usually prefer not to.

What compels me to jump back in is a fair bit of conviction about where this thing is actually headed, and it’s not an outline or theory that seems to be getting a whole lot of traction right now.

So, let’s talk about it some.

Continue reading What people are missing in conference realignment