turbografx16 – DaveGladow.com

Parasol Stars review

I want to give this a few paragraphs, because “Parasol Stars” is a game I really enjoy and it’s also a game I know won’t make the retro essentials list. (It’ll miss by a couple dozen spots at present.)

The basics here are that it’s (mostly) a non-scrolling platformer (it scrolls a bit, but it’s mostly a static area that covers at most a couple of screens) that was released on a few different platforms, perhaps most famously for the Turbografx-16 (this is how I played it, via the mini). It’s a multiplayer title, and you control these two cute little guys who have to manipulate bubbles to defeat all the enemies on the screen. Clearing the screen advances you to the next stage.

The quirk, and the reason for the title, is you use umbrellas to achieve this, and that dynamic — of using your umbrella to block attacks, collect bubbles, launch attacks, and float about the screen — provides a good time.

The graphics and sound are really top notch for this sort of thing, as well.

So, Parasol Stars is basically “Bubble Bobble,” but prettier and more fun.

That makes sense, since it’s a direct sequel to Bubble Bobble, after all.

Anyway, that’s the gist. I think it’s tempting to think of a game like this as being outdated by the time of its release, let alone today, but pushing that thought aside results in enjoyment that isn’t to be dismissed … it flirts with “must-play” status for me. I roped my oldest daughter into playing it with me, and we had a ball. It’s good in single-player, but I think it truly sings in multiplayer. That’s the way to go if you can.

Dave’s Score: 8/10

Star Parodier — Retro Gaming Essentials (No. 49)

We haven’t really talked about Japanese imports in this countdown yet (present company excepted), and it feels like a pretty important part of the games industry at large … so let’s maybe do that, yeah?

Bonus: It gives me an excuse to talk about what is just a dang delightful game.

So, let’s go ahead and discuss “Star Parodier,” an excellent “cute ‘em up” that somehow didn’t get ported to America for a couple of decades despite it being a feast visually, aurally, and gameplay-wise, while also being that rarest of things shooters so often fail to even remotely consider during planning and development:

It’s approachable.

Star Parodier at a glance:
Genre: Shooter
Released: 1992
Platform: PC Engine Super CD
9/10 score from Nintendo Life

Castlevania: Rondo of Blood — Retro Gaming Essentials (No. 10)

One of the quirkier traits of being a gamer back in the late 1980s/early 1990s was a propensity for allegiance. Oh, I know even today people get weirdly territorial about which system they will go to war over, but back then it wasn’t just centered around the consoles, or even just the mascots/characters from the first party developers like Nintendo and Sega, but also toward the mascots of third party developers.

I think some of the reason for this was the Wild West newness of the medium, wherein assurances of quality were sparse and hurdles toward playing were significant. Most of us didn’t have $50 just lying around to blow on any old game. We had to find characters and series that worked and then would stick with them, almost as a defense mechanism. Devotion to a particular game series wasn’t just a personal choice; it was a practical way of living.

Back in those days, I fancied myself a pretty big Mega Man fan, and that fandom was rewarded with several quality games and many hours of enjoyment. I loved the rock-paper-scissors aspects to strategy, the cutesy robot designs, and the freedom to explore levels in whatever order I wanted.

My brother, on the other hand, was more of a Castlevania fan, embracing the slightly more mature themes and the options available in terms of switching characters, weapons and routes.

But whereas my appreciation for my entry point into Mega Man (Mega Man 2) has never waned or diminished, my willingness to extol the virtues of the rest of the series has fallen off some.

If you’ve played one Mega Man game, you’ve kinda played them all.

In sharp contrast, Castlevania games meander off of the established path. They experiment. They evolve. They take risks. And as a result, they make themselves more lastingly relevant.

Ask me today which series is the one I’d go to bat for, and without question it’s now Castlevania instead of Mega Man.

Why am I telling you all of this? I promise I’m coming around to the point of that intro, and it’s this:

Castlevania: Rondo of Blood represents a crossroads for the series, wherein the previously stated evolution of the property hit its stride. This was arguably the last truly great “traditional” version of Castlevania (and in my opinion, the best of the entire bunch) before the series would fully embrace its exploratory dynamics. It’s the bridge, so to speak, between the old and the new, and it’s the best possible representation of the evolving nature of the series.
You can probably expect to see a bunch of Castlevania games on this website as this series progresses because of that growth and diversity.

Castlevania: Rondo of Blood
Genre: Side-scrolling platformer
Released: 1993
Platform: PC Engine Super CD
391/400 on GameFan

Air Zonk — Retro Gaming Essentials (No. 3)

Every now and then, a piece of culture comes along your path that doesn’t necessarily have wide appeal or grand success, but yet it speaks to you on some level. You understand beyond a shadow of a doubt what its creators set out to do, how perfectly they achieved that task, and as a result, that particular slice of art somehow becomes yours as well.

In these cases, you’ve simultaneously taken on the rare honor of relatively exclusive ownership (and all of the smugness that knowledge entails), while also being given the mantel of responsibility of trying to share the good word. You are not merely an observer of greatness; you’re also now a part of it.

I have before, am now, and will in the future be forever a preacher at the alter of Air Zonk.

Air Zonk
Genre: Shooter
Released: 1992
Platform: TurboGrafx-16
Avg. Critic Score: 8/10

All the Turbografx-16 Mini games ranked

Here’s where I crack my knuckles, take a deep breath, and get to work: I’m going to rank all of the games on the Turbografx-16 Mini (and give you a few thoughts on the system itself), and while this is without a doubt a silly undertaking, I am after all, a silly man.

If you have no clue what I’m talking about, let me catch you up! The Turbografx-16 Mini is the latest and greatest* retro micro-console to hit the video game market. These “mini” consoles are basically plug-and-play versions of classic gaming systems from the past pre-loaded with a set number of games and designed to work with modern televisions. This particular one is over 50 games, some of which are NOTORIOUSLY (all caps) difficult/expensive to acquire.

* Yes, it’s the best of the mini consoles, and by a substantial margin.

My nostalgia for the original system is well documented. And the good news is the new mini-system lives up to basically all expectations. Yes, it’s niche. Yes, it has some (okay, several) clunkers. But it gets into levels of greatness and insanity most systems stay away from at all costs.

Hey Nintendo, release 60 percent of your games in Japanese, you cowards.

Five games the Turbografx-16 Mini needs

The Turbografx-16 Mini is getting closer and closer.

The official Twitter account of the PC-Engine Mini (the Japanese version of the system) recently sent out a tweet showing the box art for the device.

【速報】工場から箱が届いたのでパシャリ。写真の腕前はご容赦ください。（H） #PCエンジンミニ pic.twitter.com/lBUxZppo7k

— PCエンジン mini公式@2020年3月19日発売 (@PCEngine_Mini) November 21, 2019

This tweet had the two-fold effect of:

Making me once again super excited for a product that is still roughly four months away.
Making me sad about the now seemingly near 0% chance that any more games will be added to it.

On that first point, here’s where I express thanks and appreciation for what we are getting. Yes, it could be better (and we’ll be getting to that point shortly), but it is not lost on me that I get to both experience the nostalgia of some of my favorite games from my youth, but also I get to play the games that I never could at the time (all for a price point I can afford). That last point is HUGE, because the Japanese games that did NOT port over to the United States were oftentimes much better than their American counterparts. Trying to acquire them was difficult/expensive, so it became a non-starter.

I recall being insanely jealous that I couldn’t play Castlevania: Rondo of Blood or Street Fighter II on my Turbografx-16. But having already sunk money into the expensive CD add-on, I was wary of trying to jump through the financial hoops necessary to try to play these amazing games.

But in four months, that’s not going to be a problem anymore, because on the American version of this mini, they’re including games localized to America AND Japan, and that Japan lineup is pretty much just a bunch of kick-ass all-stars (and a few weirdos, but whatever).

But anyway, on to Point 2, which is the point [sic] of this article.

I feel there are still some pretty important games that are missing. I’ve hoped some of them might be added, but alas, that doesn’t seem likely.

Still, I’m ever the optimist. In this article I propose the manufacturer of this exciting system, Konami, make five simple additions to take this system from great to phenomenal. Konami could make the call to replace five games, just five games on this thing and it would be basically amazing.

There’s value in nostalgia

I’ve gone and done it. And by “it” I of course mean, “convinced my poor wife to bless my purchase of another micro video gaming system.”

In this case, it was the TurboGrafx-16 Mini, an absurdly niche system that was only available for pre-order on Amazon.com … probably so that the manufacturer could get an accurate head count on just how many machines to produce. The original system was not a big seller when it debuted in the United States back in the late 1980s, so prudence, it would seem, is more than justified here.

This system joins the hallowed ground of the NES Classic, Super NES Classic and the soon to be purchased Genesis Mini as micro-consoles occupying a place of prominence in our entertainment center.

For lots of people, these systems serve as collectible trophies, trinkets to be displayed but basically non-functional. For me, they’re so much more.