Sega – DaveGladow.com

Crazy Taxi — Retro Gaming Essentials (No. 56)

“Let’s go make some keraaaaazy money!”

Yeah, that’s the good stuff.

There might not be a better case for the very existence of video games than “Crazy Taxi.”

It’s not a sentiment I feel needs any hedging. If I were to sit down with a non-gamer and try to explain to them the reason for gaming in the first place, I would probably turn to Crazy Taxi at some point in the discussion, or if my words were failing me at that point, simply point at the game and grunt.

The reasons for this are pretty easily summarized.

Crazy Taxi is a game that fits the medium of interactive entertainment like a driving glove.* It is an excellent example of what the thing is.
Crazy Taxi, with almost no investment required by the player whatsoever, provides completely unbridled adrenaline and joy.

* Yes, I have given myself full LICENSE to make as many driving puns/references as I‘d like, and we’re all just going to have to BUCKLE UP and deal with that.

On that first point, driving games are significantly responsive to what the player does. They are immersive and immediate about feedback. Hit the gas: surge forward. Turn left: go around the corner. Turn too far left: go off a cliff. All of this is really easy to understand and relate to.

But circling back to point two, more so than perhaps any other genre in video gaming, the mere notion of enjoyment is really friggin’ important in racing games.

That might sound kind of ridiculous on the face of it – I mean, we play games for enjoyment, yes? Shouldn’t that be the key consideration when evaluating any game?

But looking at something like another recent entry in this countdown “Resident Evil 2,” the desired reaction in the gamer in that game isn’t simply pure mirth. That game wants to frighten, to scare, to thrill. Yes, please have a good time. But do it in a specific way (by shitting your pants).

Go down the list. “Final Fantasy Tactics” wants you to engage your brain. “Tempest 2000” wants you to go into a trance-like state. “Dance Dance Revolution” wants you to jump around like a lunatic. And so on, and so on.

Crazy Taxi, on the other hand, would make Cyndi Lauper proud: It just wants you to have fun.

The game shares its devotion to freedom and joy with the arcade racing classics of yesteryear like “Pole Position” or “Out Run,” offering an opportunity to let your hair blow in the (imaginary) wind and simply bask in life for a bit while broadsiding a bus with your bright yellow tool of destruction.

And it works. A game being a proxy for real life is seldom so enjoyable an experience as through a properly conceived racer. The adrenaline is part of it, and certainly with newer games and simulations in the genre, the necessary precision (and thus perfectionism of the driver) is key too. Yet, the main goal is more generalized: about finding a relatable sense of escape.

In this countdown, the most direct comparison available to us for proving the point is the similarily cartoonish “Super Mario Kart.”

The original Mario Kart, in addition to being joyful, had the distinction of creating a whole sub-genre as it kick-started the “kart racer.” And in similar fashion, Crazy Taxi was an innovator by not being a traditional racing game either.

Both games are obsessed with creating a busy, colorful world to traverse, of providing a sharp deadline to navigate, and in allowing for the player’s devilish side to flex a little.

But here’s the primary difference: Crazy Taxi goes about these things in an even more open way than Mario Kart does.

Mario Kart is limiting by sticking to a traditional race course approach. Yes, you can go off-roading and find the occasional shortcut. But you can go the wrong direction. And you can get your racing wrong by losing to the other racers.

You can be wrong.

The true genius of Crazy Taxi is that there’s no wrong way to play.

If you have no idea what you’re doing … there is chaotic, mirthful mayhem.

If you’ve mastered the more advanced techniques and memorized the maps and know where everything is … there is chaotic, mirthful mayhem.

In sum, the notions of “success” or “winning” are basically nullified. This game rewards good and bad players alike.

Crazy Taxi is for everyone.

Crazy Taxi at a glance:
Genre: Racer
Released: 2000
Platform: Dreamcast
GamesRadar’s No. 3 Sega Dreamcast Game of All Time

Die Hard Arcade mini review

What an interesting game this is!

The interwebs tell me this game is one of the first to utilize textured 3D polygons as well as quick-time events, and that makes it a fascinating bit of a history lesson.

The game is also a kind of hybrid 3D brawler, which makes it an odd duck in a sea of sprite-based beat ‘em ups.

And the license was about eight years late in arriving, which is another bit of wackiness I love.

So, this game is really effing weird, which scores it all sorts of points with me.

As for the gameplay itself? It’s kind of tricky to control and inconsistent. On the positive side, there are special moves and weapons to liven things up.

But they got rid of Alan Rickman, which is a level of weirdness I don’t approve of.

Dave’s Score: 7/10

Wonder Boy: The Dragon’s Trap mini review

Diving into all the lore and background of this title to do a proper review doesn’t fit the format of “mini review,” so we’re gonna skip most of that.

Basically, what you need to know is that the Wonder Boy/Monster World/Adventure Island series of games is pretty dang influential within the industry, and this particular entry in the series is so well revered that it inspired a remake a few years back.

The remake makes a few quality of life changes and pretties up the graphics quite a bit, making an influential, important title from the early days of the Metroidvania genre more approachable for modern audiences.

It’s a great time. Yeah, it’s pretty short, and the controls could be tighter, but the game rarely feels unfair. Even when you’re getting juggled like a ragdoll, you’re typically not taking absurd amounts of damage in the process. I also like the design of the maps, the variety imbued through the different forms your character takes, and the pace at which it unlocks new areas.

I saw someone describe it as “What if Zelda II, only good?” And, yeah, I agree with that.

I really like it.

Dave’s Score: 9/10

Genesis Mini: Ranking all the games

Let’s be honest. This was inevitable. My obsession for mini consoles should be well established by now, and I recently purchased the Genesis Mini (and offered my general thoughts here). The only real question was whether I’d keep it simple and rank the games on the Genesis Mini, or expand the list to be a “best of” for the entire catalog of the original console.

I’ve decided to mostly go with the former. I have some thoughts on the games I feel are missing here and really wanted to share them, so I’m going to lead off with those. But I still haven’t experienced enough with the 700-game library to truly put together a proper “best-of” ranking. Sure, it would be useful to neophytes, but I wouldn’t feel super great or confident about it, either.

So instead, here are some thoughts on my favorite games missing from the Genesis Mini, followed by my ranking of the 42 games that did make the cut.

Enjoy!

Should one purchase a Genesis Mini?

So should you buy a Genesis Mini?

I’m going to hedge. Know this upfront.

Most articles like this won’t admit that in plain, written English. But it’s what the majority do.

“If [so-and-so] then yes, absolutely you should buy this.”

That’s where we’re going to end up, so skip to the end if that’s why you’re here.

But if you want to see me wax nostalgic for a bit (and maybe bring back some good memories of your own), feel free to ride along for a little bit. Because if there’s no other lesson to be taken from mini gaming consoles making a killing in the video game market right now, there’s this: These things call to mind a different time and place.

And they do it well.